Attending on H. Pylori.

Me: "I get GERD really easily"

Attending: "Have you had that checked out?"

Me: "No. Well, I tested negative for H. Pylori."

Attending: "Oh, that's good. I guess that means that you don't have to use a condom." Bursts out laughing and banging the counter. "Wait, that must be only for oral sex." More laughter. "I guess I took it too far"